oh shut up yo punk
funky groove, you chilling
what’s ya tryin to prove
sue self ass or bury alive.
whats my options nigga
worse or worst, choose nigga,
how can i explain this shit
to myself and not underestimate
the fate god put me face on Earth?
tastes yack but still lasting
spit it out, just let it go
sacred soul he put inside me
scared soul i manage to turn it
burned and no chance for cure
sure i hold on but for how long
going back was never an option
but turning right seems wrong
and turning left cant be right
but there is no road in my sight
when all lights turned out
explain how to stop standing
i listen carefully
cause im out of wisdom
homie i need help, stop yelling shit.
so lets pretend for a moment
im your shrink
you’re lunatic who stinks
sinking progress is on
lets process it ‘fore it’s too late.
i dont know how to talk,
i know words, i know sentences
but saying out loud is pointless,
you never understand my mind,
how i formulate feeling
you never even heard of?
and even if i can, you dont accept it,
you lose your nerve and yell at me,
“pull your shit together,”
i dont need to hear that shit,
i fall down and think about leaving ‘lone,
solitude seems good but is it really so,
looking in the mirror, bleeding,
feeling fear of being without
love you should bring in life
of a man that’s simply unwanted,
seems like i dont believe in love
but love is foundation i build on.
sorry i must say some
seems you have issues you dont discuss
blessings cant come if you refuse to give chances
maybe first time there’s let down
maybe even second and third
but once it comes you feel happiness
mess slowly dies and pureness comes alive,
you know she deserve it.
i fucking tried, i did, i promise
i gave too many chances, six or seven
wasnt enough, i cant keep moving forever
one day comes a point where i stop
she’s moving away and i cant keep chasing, today
i played my hand well, she lost all savings she ever saved
i would punish myself if i turn back and let one choke me do death once again
it’s too late for erasing a mistake
i wish i could turn clock back
i cant and its time to accept.
you sure you can live without her?
you sure you can live at all when support she had will never be behind your back?
think twice, nah, think twenty six times before telling her fuck off
such things you cant take back
it makes harder to live after words come out
consquences will kill you slowly, more painfully than you could ever imagine.
i know, i do know that, i know, thats why i am crying like little girl trying to figure out
how should i proceed and which could succeed more and how we both can less bleed
and stop speed which rush us to Lucy’s.
we’ll finish right now
come back tomorrow
we will find solutions.
walking streets endlessly
thinking over and over
every situation we were in
what went south and what went well
hell is behind the door
i saw his face earlier and im scared
i am so scared
fear of feeling nothing
something i wanted but really?
everything will be ordinary
and colours will fade away
im becoming one i was running away
day by day i cant recognize myself
its too late but i wont give up
i dont want to die
but being alive on Earth sucks more for sure.
inner self introduces itself
im angry motherfucker
this lifeshit you talk about
fuck you homie, you weak
you weak homie
you cant tolerate other humans
how someone can like you ever
if you cant even love truly forever
motherfucker you pushed her away
look in my eyes, you see i cry
why nigga, why, why do you need to kill me every time i open my soul
cant you see im hurting
i give you my ultimate levels
you dont even understand when its time to shut up and enjoy
oh boy, i was so wrong, you no special like you tell every living one
fuck you, i close this time and opening is off topic now
motherfucker talking kindly, i hate you, i hate you,
you’re the worst there are,
motherfucker suicide is only thing you can do now.
voices come and go, maybe i hallucinate, maybe not
what’s the differance anyway
if i do as he says im cray but if i talk back then im just analyzing
i guess im losing it this time for real
booze cant really heal a man
but loose ends might grow back together with little burboun in vains
at least it gives more time to catch soul who’s running like Usain
brain cancer or some disorder who knows
im no diagnostician
healthy approuch didnt work, i try some else
lets see where i end up.
knocking on the door again
seven in the morning why am i here
fuck i cant leave now
he opens up, Lucy as it’s finest.
u ready boy? come in, lets talk
and recruitment starts again
i did all paperwork for transfering you here
just say yes and we welcome you home
dont hesitate, live forever where no fear is bigger than you
where you rule the world how ever you fit best
say you want it, say you need it
accept faith, you belong among us.
hold on for a sec, i might be ready but help me choose by listening my troubles
at least one last time
lets pretend one more time, you are shrink
i am just another sinking soul who thinking about leaving into hole.
okay, fine, i hear you, proceed young homie, let see what ya got.
i am two face motherfucker
when im high im king and when i fall im just another hopeless thing
i have dreams i dream and i have fears and failures i deal with
i am loyal and i can betray anyone as quick as i blink
i lie every day endlessy and tell truth about everything
i know right and i know wrong, but i know no difference they present
at least sometimes, even more
i dont deserve life, i dont deserve love she could pass me on
i deserve pain without possibility to laugh it off
i know determination is everything but all i want is terminate myself
well minded and educated but seeing no purpose of breathing
ignorance must be bliss, hell fits me best.
i see you, if i could live i would smile right now and say good boy
but hell nah, we in the darkness nigga, come through that door
and going back i just another hopeless dream you never achieve
we need you here, well educated and smarter than most of them
we want you here, you are the asset for every single soul in here
now its your turn to say you want us, you need us
you know its true.
nah i need more time, i need forgiveness from her
i need peace to slowly fade away
i cant go away like this
i come back tomorrow with a yes
give me twenty four hours to get this straight.
where should i start
what will i say to her
i cant formulize any sentences that can make any sense
situation so tense
hands shaking and i hope she responds the way i could find peace
honey, listen, i know i hurt you a lot by not doing everything for us
i know last time i went for easy route just to stay alive
but im leaving with next train and never coming back
please forgive me all my sins
i didnt get all the hints you left me
i didnt hear all the whispers there were behind walls
but i did love you truly, i did try to maintain our relation
you were everything i needed every day i went to sleep
you were my healing component i needed
i need it right now too but i already sold my soul to coldness
i made mistakes and sometimes i drowned them in bottles
but all because i love you more than self and i couldnt accept your absence
i know im no position for asking your forgiveness
but i cant step in that carriage if you cant say you dont hate me
i hate myself for destroying us with my neediness and love that was selfish
i hope you pass this stage and smile after months go by
you will find one who deserves and loves you like you are
because i only loved you like you were when i felt secure
everytime i misplaced my happiness i blamed your ass
i must go regardless you say, train’s leaving and i cant miss it.
knock knock, where’s lucy
im here to say yes
slowly sway to hell
and never look back
im here to serve the purpose.
im sorry who you are
its dry cleaning and monday morning
go away you crazy man
or i will call police officer.
what a fuck just happend
where is lucy
where am i
i cant stay here,
i already stepped off
i cant blend in nowhere
i cant be pending between two worlds
fuck me, i was late
i must pay my debt
living forever like Davy Jones
i need some sleep
im falling into deep blindness